At the center of every marriage are the wedding vows. These intimate words spoken by the couple to each other declare both an intent and a promise. As husband and wife, they promise to work hard at living out this intent, no matter how challenging that may be, because of love and commitment to each other. But a life-changing diagnosis can test the wedding vow “in sickness and in health” and relationships on many levels. Such an experience will change you. 

People have varying tolerance thresholds. Some can see past the serious illness while others may not be able or willing to. When saying the vows “in sickness and in health,” not many have realized how hard it will be when that time comes around. The word “vow” was in noun form during your wedding ceremony, making a solemn promise. But in marriage, the “vow” is turned into a verb; this is put into action, and couples must walk that promise out, especially in sickness. 

A diagnosis can be a wake-up call to life. In the context of a partnership or marriage, how much sickness and health can you live with? At what point do you say it’s your limit and won’t deal with it. Below are books written by people with sick spouses and their journey through this ordeal.  

In Sickness and in Health 

Do you recall the reason behind your undying love for your spouse? Well, for Ben Mattlin’s wife, it’s his confidence and sheer determination. He may be immobilized, but this did not stop her from loving him. In this frank and humorous exploration of the Mattlin couple’s quest to understand the perils and pleasures of interabled romance comes an emotional truth in every marriage, love, or even in dating. Essentially, In Sickness and in Health is a truly inspiring account of how a man born with spinal muscular atrophy survived childhood, graduated from an Ivy League, built a happy family, established a successful journalism career, and lived happily ever after. But like any story, life isn’t smooth sailing; his marriage with an able-bodied woman has been met with varying reactions from outsiders.  

Ben Mattline made an insightful exploration of what a couple may face when one partner lives with a disability. This powerful book is a very candid take of the unique and daunting obstacles face in their daily lives in sickness and in health. 

Going… Going…: The Abduction of a Mind

Love blossoms when you least expect it, and the author and his beloved wife are a testament to that. Jack Weaver and his wife, Janey, met very young and fell in love. What a joyous feeling that was, finding love at such a young age and never parting from them. Married and built a family together, doing everything together. Everything was good until a devastating diagnosis, and little by little, Janey’s memories begin to fade. The next fifteen-year journey along the trail of Alzheimer’s wasn’t the smoothest nor the roughest. Jack could have given up, but their lasting love for each other motivated the couple to pass through swamps of despair, vistas of grief until they’ve reached mountains of happiness and hope. 

Going… Going…: The Abduction of a Mind is an inspiring chronicle of a couple who never broke their vows even in the hardest time of their lives. This illuminating look at a very particular kind of relationship is a powerful statement for couples whose relationship is shaken by a diagnosis. 

Worth Fighting For 

Patrick Swayze was the biggest star of the 80s, a dancing machine that had been charming women even before his act in Dirty Dancing. And his wife, Lisa Neimi, can’t help but fall for this amazing man before he rose to fame. After a miscarriage, the couple invested their time and love in each other and on their ranch full of dogs, horses, and cattle. It was perfect family life nonetheless. They led a happy marriage until that is when Patrick was diagnosed with stage IV pancreatic cancer. Still, they spend fighting this illness together until his death. 

Lisa Neimi details her marriage and the healing power each day holds, even in the most difficult circumstances. All Lisa wants to share is if Patrick has a strong fighting spirit, then so should she. This heartbreaking account boasts the emotional honesty and unflinching truth couples need to understand regarding love and marriage. Worth Fighting For is a candid tribute to love lost but never forgotten. 

A health challenge can be daunting to both you and your partner. And the ability to stay positive during this is never easy. Health issues will affect romantic relationships, and now more than ever, you need to lean on each other at these trying times.